The self help industry is huge and I predict it to grow bigger. I predict that because society is really facing a crisis in regard to our moral principles and values and albeit you not seeing it (perhaps) in your day to day life, this happening in front of you, it is happening. Hence, I believe more and more people will seek advice in all sorts of forms and for sorts of things. However, don’t we all?
I dish out my advice and views, but what I do want you to know is that a potent metaphor that inspires us to be thoughtful and deliberate in our decisions is to see life advice not as unchangeable laws but rather as trying on clothes. Advice must be adapted to meet our specific personalities, circumstances, and objectives just as various dress styles suit various body types. This method acknowledges that what functions well for one individual may not function at all for another. I want you to be discerning in everything. That does not mean to be critical and that all advice may potentially be bad. It means you need to be able to know when to accept and build on a piece of advice vs. letting it slide by. Not all advise will compliment and fit us perfectly. We should be willing to let go of advise that does not reflect who we truly are or does not advance our progress in the same way that we would discard unflattering clothing. Because every person’s journey is different, what may be beneficial to one person may be harmful to or ineffectual for another. In order to choose the advise that best meets our unique needs and objectives, we must acknowledge and respect our individuality (and again, this is not about feelings or this whole “identity” crisis happening today). It’s simply important to note that that our needs and circumstances evolve over time.
In essence, the metaphor of trying on clothes highlights the importance of being selective, adaptable, and true to ourselves when it comes to seeking and embracing advice. By recognizing that advice is not a one-size-fits-all solution, we empower ourselves to make informed choices that enhance our journey.
Embracing Individuality in Advice
It’s important to keep in mind that not all advice is created equal in a world where there is a never-ending supply of it – myself included. Everybody has a different journey that is influenced by their experiences, values, and objectives. Because of this, it’s crucial to approach advice with caution, like I said above, understanding that what works for one person may not necessarily work for another. When determining which advice to apply to your life, embrace your uniqueness and believe in your gut.
The fact that many people who enter the personal development realm are anxious and unsure of themselves is, to me, one of the risks of manipulation. Therefore, when you as an individual receive advise that doesn’t work for you, I tend to see that people place the blame on themselves rather than the advice. There is a very fine nuance there. The same goes for children and teens. Understand that what works for one child might not be appropriate for another. Allowing them the flexibility to investigate their interests, values, and aspirations, will enable them to select advice that resonates with their authentic selves. The problem today, is that it is not advice. It is indoctrination of ideology that is forced upon these young minds.
For their development and independence, it’s essential to give kids and teenagers the freedom to make their own decisions. Help them understand that not all advise will be a great fit for them by teaching them to approach it like putting on a pair of clothes. Encourage them as parents to assess the advice they are given critically, taking into account its applicability, likelihood of success, and compatibility with their values. By developing their decision-making abilities, children and teens will be able to recognize and choose advise that promotes their own development and well being. I want you as a parent to help them understand that advice is not static but ever-evolving.
Similar to how clothing choices are made to fit a person’s body type and personal preferences, advise should be carefully picked to fit your situation. Take into account the advice’s context and applicability to your particular circumstance. Ask yourself: Does this align with my values and goals? Will it contribute positively to my journey? By exercising this discernment, you can find advice that resonates with you and yields meaningful results.
Since life is constantly changing, what may have worked for you in the past might not be as useful today. It’s critical to review the guidance you’ve received and reevaluate its efficacy as you develop and learn. I know that in my early career, some of the advice given to me is definitely not applicable today, whereas other things have stuck with me. Don’t be scared to change and dismiss outdated advice if it no longer applies to your situation or promotes your personal development. Accept the freedom to alter and rethink your strategy while searching out guidance that helps you advance. I feel like when it comes to this our inner “filter” has been broken with the information overload. We no longer know what is real, what is not, who really (authentically) cares and who’s the con man. Somewhere deep down inside though, I still believe in the good of humanity, and though we should take all things with a grain of salt, we should be able to instinctively know what advice suites us and what not.
Navigating the Sea of Advice
It’s crucial to seek guidance from reliable sources – people with proven knowledge and experience in the field—when you need specific advice. Look for mentors, coaches, or experts who may offer knowledgeable viewpoints and insights. Think on how well their track record, reputation, and values match up. You may make sure that the advise you receive is of true worth and relevance by placing a higher priority on quality than quantity. One of the biggest problems for me is when people, especially in today’s online world (where everyone is an expert in everything), rather than discussing the issue at hand or displaying the core of their advice, throw out a bunch of credentials and pieces of paper with their name on it. I honestly could care less, and so should you. Advice can come from anyone, not just the double doctor who studied something particular. Because that doctor has a view on the subject based on his/her life’s experiences whereas someone with similar credentials may view things very differently.
Like I said, many different individuals can offer advice, including friends, relatives, coworkers, and even total strangers. Be receptive to different viewpoints since they can provide insightful observations and novel perspectives. Discussions should be intelligent; listen intently; and take into account opposing points of view. That statement is so important. We cannot let society frame everything to the extremes – simply because it doesn’t fit that individuals world view. The only way you will develop as a human and increase your knowledge and get a better awareness of the world around you is by embracing this openness. And I am not talking about this fake solidarity being preached today.
There is a wealth of knowledge waiting to be discovered in the world. Cultivate a curious mindset and nurture a thirst for learning. Read books, go to seminars, look into online courses, and have in-depth discussions. My mother-in-law wants to attend an online course in which I think is most likely irrelevant, however, for her it is important, hence I encourage her to do so. I understand that it will widen her horizon and who knows what will come of it. If i immediately dismiss it, then it is I who has a closed mindset. You can only widen your horizons, find novel solutions, and adopt new viewpoints by remaining curious and continuously searching out new information. Always keep in mind that learning from our experiences is a lifetime journey.
Crafting Your Personal Advice Toolkit
Being highly self-aware is essential for navigating the advice landscape. Spend some time reflecting on yourself to learn about your values, strengths, and limitations. This self-examination will provide you a strong basis for assessing advice and determining what is in line with your true nature. You can make decisions that are genuine to yourself by getting to know yourself well and ignoring advice that doesn’t fit with your individual characteristics.
Life is a series of trials and errors.
Accept an experimental mindset as you experiment with various pieces of advice. Check out what works and what doesn’t for you. Remember that what works for one person may not work for you, and vice versa. Be open to modifying and improving your strategy. Take into account your experiences as you change your course, and don’t be hesitant to venture beyond of your comfort zone. You’ll learn the guidance that really empowers you through this iterative approach.
Like I said earlier with our filters being broken, still, trust your own voice amidst the advice bombardment. Intuition is a powerful guide, often rooted in your accumulated experiences and subconscious wisdom. Learn to pay attention to the messages your body and mind send you and to trust your gut. Although taking advise from others might be helpful, never forget that you have your own special thoughts and viewpoints. Develop self-trust and rely on your intuition to help you make choices that are true to your actual self.
Take life advice with a critical eye and customize it to meet your individual journey. Accept your uniqueness, pick your advisors wisely, and change as you advance. Seek guidance from reliable sources, take into account many viewpoints, and maintain curiosity. Create your own set of tools by reflecting, trying new things, and having faith in yourself. (Read that again – “faith in yourself”) The art of advise is finding what flatters and enriches your own individual masterpiece because life is an ever-changing canvas.